The other day I talked to a woman in a frustrating situation. She had a giant crush on a co-worker named Aaron, who was cute and with whom she shared a lot in common. However, their relationship hadn’t progressed beyond saying “hi” in the hallway and an occasional conversation during break.
In general, he kept to himself and was shy. Because he was quiet, she asked the question to herself: is he uninterested or just shy? It was frustrating because she had dated extroverted guys in the past.
You might know a guy like Aaron. You have feelings for him and want to date him, but his shyness holds you back. Or maybe you’re fairly close to him, but you wonder if his failure to make the first move is shyness or lack of romantic interest. This article will go over the signs a shy guy likes you.
As a dating coach who works with shy men, I can tell you the signs to look for to determine how he really feels about you! So, here are the signs.
1. Body Language Signs
As with the case of Aaron, the biggest problem when dealing with introverted guys is that you can’t rely on their words to guide you in whether or not they like you. So, what can you do? You can look at their body language towards you!
Body language is mostly given and received subconsciously. So, this means that the shy guy in your life might not be able to share his feelings towards you verbally, but he might be sending you extreme messages through his body language. Unconscious communication is usually far more honest than spoken words.
But, you might either be missing those cues or second-guessing yourself. These are body language signs a shy guy likes you. Look for them and you can see what he’s really thinking.
2. Open And Engaging
A general rule of body language is that if the person’s body is open, he or she is open to you, but a closed body means a closed attitude. So, look at the shy man’s body and see how he looks when he’s around you. The “around you” part is key since body language changes quickly and is situational.
If you hang around him and his body seems open, it’s a good sign he likes you in some capacity. This means open arms, spread out legs, smiling, and relaxed. Closed body language is crossed arms and legs, frowning, and a hunched overlook.
In addition, engaging body language is a positive sign that he likes you. The biggest sign of an engaging body is leaning in when you talk and pointing his body in your direction. If, however, he is leaning away when he talks, plays with his phone, and points towards someone else, he’s probably not too interested.
3. Eye Contact
Have you ever looked at something amazing and beautiful? You can’t help but stare! It’s a basic fact of human nature that we look at what we like. It’s not even all that easy to fight it. It just happens.
So, take a look at the eyes of the shy man you like. Does he look at you with extra long glances? Do you catch him staring at you, then looking away when you make eye contact?
If you can’t tell, you might want to consult your friends and others around him. They can tell you if he stares when you’re not looking.
Touching others is a sign of rapport. If you touch someone, you clearly are comfortable with him or her. The same goes if the other person touches you. In fact, his touch could be an attempt to assess your romantic interest in him.
So, if you touch him and he touches you, even non-romantically, it’s a sign that he’s comfortable with physical contact. That’s the first building block of romance.
Remember that these are signs that he likes you in some capacity. It might just signal comfort and friendship. But, if you see these body language signs, it’s a good first step in knowing that he feels something positive for you. You’ll need to look at other signs to be sure.
6. Time And Attention
Do you have favorite hobbies? What about people that you really like and dislike? If you’re like most people, you give your attention to what you like and actively avoid what you don’t. If you really like a person, place, or thing, you give it your constant and best time and attention.
One of the best signs a shy guy likes you is if he gives you a lot of time and attention. Does he text back quickly? If you ask him to do something, does he always say yes? Does he always want to sit with you at the lunch table during work? If it’s clear you’re a priority in his life, then he probably feels some level of attraction.
7. He Doesn’t Date
Here’s a secret of many guys: they avoid going on dates with a variety of women because they have their hearts set on one particular woman. This could even be someone they like from afar, like a friend, co-worker, or acquaintance.
So, if the shy man you have a crush on spends a lot of time with you and doesn’t seem to be dating anyone else, there’s a solid chance that he secretly likes you. But, he might not quite have the courage or be extroverted enough to be upfront about it.
Compare the time you’ve known him with the time he’s been without a date. If the two overlap, he might be holding out for a relationship with you!
Go With Your Gut
Chances are you have a good sense if an introverted guy likes you. You might second guess yourself or question it because he isn’t doing a very good job of giving you feedback since he’s shy.
However, if you have a gut feeling that the guy is attracted to you, combined with these other signs, then you can be almost fairly certain that he feels romantic attraction towards you.
So, these tips should help you determine if a shy guy has feelings for you. If you see them, especially several of them, you can be pretty confident he feels the same as you. You can confidently pursue dating with him!
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